34-year-old husband tasked with watching his kids for 20 minutes while his wife makes dinner, chaos ensues: 'I do this all day by myself AND work'

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Ben Weiss • Writer and Editor
Sep 16, 2025 7:00 AM EDT

Parenting is always a challenge, but it's considerably easier when two people are acting like a true team. Of course, it's inevitable that there will be some imbalance. If one person has a more demanding job, it's common for a couple to decide who is going to be Parent #1, so to speak. That being said, even if both parties mutually make that decision, that does not mean that there will never be a time when the roles need to be temporarily reversed. 

For some reason, this 34-year-old man managed to remain incompetent when it came time for him to briefly assume the role of Parent #1. No, we're not talking about a week. We're not even talking about one night. This man literally just had to take care of his 1-year-old and his 2-year-old for 20 minutes while his wife was cooking dinner. It ended up being a total disaster.

As we mentioned, a completely 50/50 split of parental duties is unlikely to be possible, but you know you have a problem when you can't watch your own kids for the length of a sitcom episode. The funniest part was that it wasn't like the author was taking a break for peace of mind or taking care of her own mental wellbeing. No, her "break" was going to the kitchen and preparing a nutritious meal for her family of four. All she wanted was to keep her kids away for safety reasons. Thankfully, no one was injured, but the fact that her husband couldn't step up to the plate does not bode well for his future as a parent or for the future of this relationship.

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  • "[Am I wrong] for making my husband solo parent for 30 mins a day?"

    A father laughing on the floor with his kid.
    via Unsplash+ (Sandra Seitamaa)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I just want to preface that my husband is aware I'm making this post. We're not at each others throats about this, but we're definitely not in agreement.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • So I'm 30F and he's 34m, we have two kids, 1 and 2 years old. I work from home part time, 12pm-5:30pm Monday through Friday. I also watch our two kids. In the morning they get all my attention, and it's not too bad, but in
    via Ok-Air1597
  • the afternoons after their naps when I'm trying to work, keeps them entertained and taken care of it's quite difficult. We're actively working on a different solution, but this is what we have to do now. My husband comes home right around 5:30 when I get off,
    via Ok-Air1597
  • and I immediately start getting dinner ready. I hate laundry and he hates cooking so we have an agreement that I do all the cooking and he does all the laundry and I don't mind at all. The only thing I ask is for him to watch the kids and keep them out of the kitchen
    via Ok-Air1597
  • for 20-30 mins while I get dinner ready for us all. It's always a struggle for him, and I know he's tired after working all day too, but I really need to be able keep them out so they're safe and I can get it done. He usually asks for help, when one is fussing or he has to go to the bathroom or whatever. Tonight, I was in the middle of cooking,
    via Ok-Air1597
  • hands dirty, stove and oven on, and he asked if I could help change one of the kids while he held the other cause he was being fussy. I told him no, that I do this all day by myself AND work, and all I need is 20 minutes to cook for everyone. He got really upset at this saying that's not fair cause I am home
    via Ok-Air1597
  • now and I can stop for 5 minutes to help. I finally caved and helped but I feel like it's not that much to ask for 20-30 minutes to cook.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • I want to add that any other time we're both home we work together letting each other have breaks, time to relax, and both help play and take care of them, the care is very evenly split when we're both home. So AITAH for initially refusing to help my husband with our kids while trying to cook?
    via Ok-Air1597
  • A man sits next to his young daughter while sitting on the floor.
    via Unsplash+ (Sandra Seitamaa)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • bippityboppitynope 14h ago • NTA. He can handle his own children for 30 minutes. Holy h I the weaponized incompetence. He should be embarrassed.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • thesweeterpeter 14h ago . ΝΤΑ That's not solo parenting. Thats just parenting. It sounds like he leaves you with the kids a h I of a lot more than 30 mins a day
    via Ok-Air1597
  • messy tuxedo cat 14h ago . NTA, It's literally a half hour. What kind of self-respecting parent can't manage their own kids for a few minutes unassisted.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • He can learn how to get them to settle or deal with a half hour of fussing he has to go to the bathroom Why not go to the bathroom right when he gets home so he's in good shape to do his part?
    via Ok-Air1597
  • These issues are all things that teenage babysitters manage to navigate, I think a 34 year old can figure it out so your kids aren't underfoot while you're trying to cook the whole family dinner. If he needs 20-30 minutes to fold laundry, you can return the favor.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • Bubbly_Chicken_9358 14h ago NTA. Those are his kids, too. It s ks to parent two tiny kids simultaneously by yourself. Sometimes parenting s ks, and he needs to be a full parent, not a helper.
    via Ok-Air1597
  • You need to start taking some Saturdays away from your family, leaving your husband alone with the kids. He needs to get comfortable with parenting--and to understand how insane it is that you're doing it WHILE working.
    via Ok-Air1597

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family drama aita AITAH kids wife husband entitled people karma family entitled people
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